The Best Things In Life Are Free.

Believing in yourself is free.

It doesn’t cost a cent to be kind.

You don’t have to write a check to go the extra mile.

You don’t have to go to school to learn a new skill.

Connecting with an old friend costs nothing, and might mean a lot to both of you.

You can’t put a dollar value on hard work.

You can always make time for a good conversation, to offer advice, or to just listen.

There are certain things in life that are available to all of us. They don’t cost a thing, and they don’t require a fancy degree — just time, or kindness, or a little bit of effort. Make time for those things. Be good to others. Listen carefully. Challenge yourself. Work hard. Some of the best things in life are free — and entirely up to you.

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That photo at top comes via Michael Longmire for Unsplash.

The Job You Want May Not Exist Yet.

I was having a conversation the other night with a friend from college, and we were talking about how much has changed in the decade since we graduated. “Did you ever think you’d be doing the job you’re doing today?” she asked.

I didn’t. Ten years ago, my current role — being the person in charge of a newsletter program for a news organization — didn’t exist. It was six years ago this week that I launched my very first newsletter at BuzzFeed, and I remember struggling to find many other people in the industry who were working on email full time. There just weren’t that many of us around — email was usually a small part of someone’s job. Six years later, most newspapers, websites, and magazines have someone in a dedicated Newsletter Editor or Director of Newsletters role. (Often, they have an entire team devoted to email!)

I’ve been thinking about this a lot: The job I’m working in today didn’t exist five years ago. The job before that didn’t exist before I helped create it.

Which means that the job that comes next may not exist yet, either.

If you ever get worried about the future, remind yourself: There is no defined path forward. Embrace the uncertainty. Keep learning, keep reading, keep asking questions, keep working. Every day is a chance to build whatever future comes next.

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That’s a screenshot of the very first BuzzFeed Today newsletter, sent on Feb. 4, 2013.

The Show Goes On Because It’s 11:30.

“The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready; it goes on because it’s eleven-thirty.”

That’s what Lorne Michaels, creator and producer of “Saturday Night Live,” said about “SNL.” As Tina Fey explained a few years ago:

This is something Lorne has said often about “Saturday Night Live,” but it’s a great lesson in not being too precious about your writing. You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke until the last possible second, but then you have to let it go.

I remember reading those words back when “Bossypants” came out in 2011, and they stuck with me. In 2012, I decided to make a commitment to this blog, which I’d first started in 2008, but hadn’t written for regularly. I decided I wanted to write three times a week for the blog — and somehow, despite everything I was doing with Stry.us that year, I somehow stuck to it. Then I went through a lull — just a handful of posts per month. In 2015, I made myself re-commit to writing one post a week, and have stuck with that pace ever since.

I’ll admit: Many of my blog posts aren’t great. (In fact, they’re mostly bad!) But it’s something I always do. The work happens, and then I move on. Writing for this blog has taught me so much about how to do the work even when I’m in a creative rut.

Lorne and Tina are right: Don’t be too precious with your work. Your work isn’t going to be perfect. Some of it will suck. But the show goes on at 11:30 — just get it done.

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That illustration at top (of one of Dan Aykroyd’s most famous sketches), is titled ”SNL 40th Anniversary,” was created by James Gilleard, and is used here thanks to a Creative Commons license.

Set Simple Goals For 2019.

I wrote about this in my most recent Things I Believe post, and wanted to expand on it:

Commit to making time for something simple in the year ahead. Make a goal to try the crossword every morning, or to invite friends over for a home-cooked dinner ever week, or to see live music once a month. It’s the little things that often make you the happiest.

This is the time of year when people commit to New Year’s Resolutions — which inevitably end up discarded by the time February rolls around. So instead of setting a major resolution you’ll fall short on, start smaller. Start with something that’s going to help you grow, or feel more connected to your friends or community.

There are three types of goals that are easy to aim for:

Commit to a learning goal — Pledge to make time in 2019 to learn something new. If your company has a learning & development team, make it your goal to attend one of their trainings every quarter. Choose to read more — say, a new book every month. Or you can go even smaller: In 2018, when I realized that I didn’t know enough about the archives of the magazine I work at, I pledged to read one archive New Yorker story every day. It required me to set aside 30 additional minutes a day to read, but it’s helped me learn so much about the writers who’ve shaped this publication.

Commit to a personal goal — Again, keep it small. A few years ago, I pledged to save money by bringing my lunch to work more often. (The back-of-the-envelope math: Bringing a sandwich instead of buying lunch saves me about $1,500 per year. New York lunches are expensive!) You can commit to getting coffee each week with a colleague you don’t work with that often — expand your network at work! You can commit to volunteering more, or to making time for a puzzle. (I’ve never been one for crosswords, but I made it my goal in 2018 to try to get better at them. I’m still not very good, but I can get through about Wednesday in The New York Times, thanks to regular practice.) In 2019, I’d like to try to have friends over for a home-cooked dinner at least once a month. It’s a small goal, but it might push me to try to cook more (which I always enjoy!) and to connect with old friends (always wonderful!).

Commit to a fitness goal — A few years ago, I made it my goal to run 500 miles in a year — and I didn’t come close. (I ran 70 miles in the first three months, and 57 the rest of the year.) Reach goals for exercise are especially hard to hit. Set a more reasonable goal instead: Make it your goal to try a new fitness class every month. Or do what I’m going to try in 2019: To run three races (probably in the 5k-10k range) over the course of the year. One race every four months is doable, but would still be a real achievement for me.

Most importantly: Once you’ve set your goal, find an accountability partner to hold you to it. If you have someone there to keep track of your progress and urge you on, it makes it so much easier to keep going.

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That photo of a planner comes via Estée Janssens and Unsplash.

Try It Before You Realize How Hard It Is.

When I was 17, I got an summer internship working at a paper on Nantucket. It didn’t pay much, but the paper was small — there were maybe eight of us, total, putting out a newspaper every Wednesday — and they gave me opportunities to write. For a high school junior, it was a great job.

Being young had its advantages: I was willing to say “yes” to assignments that more veteran reporters would have been wise enough to say “no” to. I pitched a weekly profile on local workers, a new police blotter column, and several big feature stories. It was a lot for one reporter to take on, but I didn’t have enough experience to know better.

But nothing really compared to something my boss, Don, pitched to me. He’d seen a weekly paper in another town that had printed an ambitious special section. They’d dispatched a handful of reporters and photographers, in shifts, to document a single day in their town, and then packaged it all together into a special section on 24 hours in the life of their city.

Don suggested that instead of having a team of reporters and photographers attempt that, I could do it alone. 24 hours, a bunch of stories and original photos — by myself.

No one else on staff would have been dumb enough to agree to that. Of course, I did.

So what happened? That day, I set out with a camera, a notepad, and my RadioShack tape recorder. (It was 2004.) It was a quite the day: I interviewed people all over the island, ate lobster on the beach (for journalism! And also for my first-ever expense report!), and reported a story from a nightclub that wouldn’t legally allow me to enter their premises for another four years. At one point, in the middle of the afternoon, I stopped by the office to hand over a flash drive of photos. I remember one of my co-workers semi-jokingly announcing, “Look! He’s still alive!”

In the end, we turned my package of stories and photos into its own eight-page section of the paper. My bosses were thrilled, and so was I: By trying something that no one else was willing to try, I ended up with my own section of the paper. Not bad for a summer intern!

Naïveté was my secret weapon that summer. I wasn’t scared or nervous or overwhelmed by anything at the paper — just excited to try new things. That mentality got me all sorts of exciting opportunities. Over and over, I tried things because I didn’t know how hard they were supposed to be. Fifteen years later, I’ve learned how hard many of these things really are — but I’m still trying to push for new things anyway.

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That’s a photo I took a few years ago, flying above Nantucket.

Find An Accountability Partner.

A little while back, I wrote about one of my proudest personal success stories: The year I lost 30 pounds. What was my secret that year? It was simple: I had people in my life who held me accountable:

That was the year I started working out a few times a month with a personal trainer. Having someone there to push me and encourage me really helped — I was willing to try workouts that I would never have tried without a workout partner. I also tried harder knowing that someone was watching (and judging!) me. With someone else there for my workouts, I couldn’t be lazy, and I couldn’t quit.

The other thing that helped: Dad and I held each other accountable. I’d text him after my workouts, and he’d text me after mine. If I found out that Dad had gone for a long bike ride or a swim, I knew I needed to make time for the gym, too. One of us couldn’t let up if the other one was still working hard.

My trainer and my dad were what I’ve started calling Accountability Partners. They were there to check up on me, and make sure I was staying on track. If I made a promise, they were there to make sure I kept it.

Up until this year, my Accountability Partners had always been people. But in the last few months, I’ve tried something new to hold myself accountable: Apps.

For workouts, I’ve tried Aaptiv. It’s an app with audio-based workouts for every part of the gym. You pick the level of intensity, length of workout, and type of workout (treadmill, stair climber, elliptical, etc), and Aaptiv suggests a handful of workouts, led by a trainer. I’ve loved the combination of familiarity — a favorite trainer coaching you in your ear — and music. I find that I get a lot more out of each workout when I’ve got someone coaching me through it. Last year, I might have gone to the gym for 20 minutes, felt a little lazy, and have just jogged slowly for a mile or two on the treadmill. This year, having Aaptiv has made sure that I actually put in real work when I’m at the gym.

When it comes to eating well, I’ve experimented with Weight Watchers. I don’t do it for long stretches — a month at a time, max — but it’s helpful in keeping me from wasting calories on unhealthy snacks or desserts. Their app makes it simple to track your meals, and I find that when I’m using the app, I typically drink a little less and eat a little better.

At work, my big weakness is wasting time. (An unfortunate side effect of working on the internet is that you’re always on the internet!) I haven’t found an app I truly love for staying productive, but I have had some success with Forest. You set a timer, and it keeps you from opening a tab and heading to Facebook, YouTube, or the other sites where you might waste a few minutes. When my mind drifts and I go to open a new tab, Forest makes sure I keep my focus.

Nothing is quite as good as a friend or co-worker to hold you accountable. But in certain cases, an app can serve as a pretty good Accountability Partner, and help you do good work.

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That photo of a team supporting each other comes via Unsplash.

Ignore The Wheel. Watch The Board.

The Oshinsky family has been watching a lot of “Wheel of Fortune” lately. The more I watch, the more I realize how much strategy goes into playing “Wheel.”

In particular, I’ve noticed something that nearly all the best players do: They ignore what’s happening on the wheel. As soon as they spin, they turn right back to the board, and try to figure out the puzzle.

“Wheel” is a game full of distractions. There are two hosts (Pat and Vanna), a wheel full of prizes, two other contestants, and a studio audience, not to mention all the lights and cameras. There’s a lot going on — and so many contestants get distracted. Every night, there’s a contestant who’s too busy watching the cash and prizes spin around on the wheel, and when they have to call a letter, they have no idea what to say. They panic and miss.

The secret is simple, though: Just keep watching the board. It doesn’t matter what the wheel lands on — Pat always calls out the dollar value anyway. The three or four seconds when the wheel is spinning is time when you could be solving the puzzle in your own head.

It’s so easy — whether you’re on “Wheel”  or at work — to take your eyes off the ultimate goal. Much of what’s happening around you is a distraction. You have to keep asking yourself: What really matters here? Am I focused on the right thing? What does success look like, and am I working on things to help us achieve it?

In other words: Ignore the wheel. Just watch the board.

Do The Damn Thing, Dan.

I’ve been using this to-do app, TeuxDeux, for seven or eight years now. I swear by it. Everything that I need to do during the day, from attending weekly meetings to running an errand, goes in TeuxDeux. If I’m on the go and I suddenly remember that I need to follow up with someone or take care of a task, I add it to TeuxDeux. As long as it’s on my list, I won’t forget to do it.

But the issue isn’t always forgetting to do certain tasks. Sometimes, I see a task and realize that it’s going to take some time, or put me in a situation where I have to have an uncomfortable conversation with a colleague, and I tell myself, “Maybe I’ll save this for tomorrow. I’ll be in a better space to handle this then.”

The nice thing about TeuxDeux is that if you don’t cross something off the list, it just moves on to the next day, ready to be crossed off.

The bad thing is: If you procrastinate enough, you show up for work on Monday and see a half-dozen of those “Maybe tomorrow!” kind of tasks piling up on your to-do list.

I’ve finally had enough of those days. I need to hold myself accountable and make time to cross these things off my list. So I’m starting a new routine: I’ve added a twice-monthly block of time specifically designated for these types of tasks. I’m calling it DTDT Time: Do The Damn Thing Time. (It needs a better name, but it works for now.)

It’s a 90-minute block, every Tuesday — when things tend to be a little calmer around the office — to make sure I take care of those lingering to-dos. If I’ve been putting something off, well, it’s time to finally take it on. It does me no good to drag my feet on these. I’ve just got to do the damn thing — and hopefully, with this new routine, I’ll be making the time to do just that.

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That image of TeuxDeux comes via their blog.

Be Wrong More Often.

Most of my ideas are bad. Recently, I started a notebook that I’ve been filling exclusively with bad ideas: TV shows that should never get made, apps that should never be launched, products that should never be spoken of to another human being. It’s humbling to add another bad idea to the notebook. For every 100 ideas I have, 70 are incredibly bad, 20 are acceptably terrible, and maybe — if I’m lucky — 10 are decent enough to do something with.

And I think that’s a pretty good success rate.

In my time at BuzzFeed, I learned that it was OK to have ideas that didn’t work out. There was so much that we did at BuzzFeed that worked, and worked incredibly well. But for every launch that grew into something big, there were dozens of ideas that failed: BuzzFeed University (a program to get ad agencies to create their own BuzzFeed sponsored content), Star.me (a collaborative social media site that was a cross between BuzzFeed and Giphy), or Fre.sh (a leaderboard for the internet). These were the kinds of projects that, as Jonah Peretti wrote in a 2013 memo to the staff, “don’t distract from the core and have the potential to be much bigger in the medium term future.” They weren’t, but that didn’t matter. As the internet mantra goes: We failed fast, and often.

But here’s something I didn’t always understand about that saying: It’s not just about trying lots of things and seeing what sticks. The hard part is reminding yourself that it’s OK to be wrong.

I’ve never met anyone who liked being wrong. But I’ve met some who have accepted it as part of the process. You come up with ideas, or you test out a new theory, and it doesn’t work out. Then you have to admit to yourself and to your team that the thing you believed in isn’t worth pursuing anymore, or that you need to change course. (Sometimes, even when it’s painful, you’ll even have to admit to a colleague: “Yes, you were right.”) The most productive people I know have these conversations on a monthly basis — or sometimes, weekly.

In other words: If you’re doing things right, you’ll often be wrong.

It’s not easy to admit that your ideas aren’t great. It’s not easy to admit that you were wrong. It’s not easy to kill your darlings.

But it’s part of the process: Come up with lots of ideas, pick your favorites, and be willing to be wrong. Don’t get discouraged: Just because you were wrong before doesn’t mean you’ll be wrong forever. The great ideas will come soon enough.

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That photo of a stop symbol comes via Kai Pilger and Unsplash.

The Gym Radius, and What It Means For Your Work.

A few months ago, I started going to a new gym. I’d been at the same one for a few years, and I generally liked it. It was a huge space, with lots of daily classes, tons of machines, and nice locker rooms. They had multiple locations across the city. But despite that, I’d pretty much stopped going.

It wasn’t the gym itself — it was the location. The gym was a 12-minute walk from my apartment, and on anything less than a perfect day, I’d talk myself out of working out. I’d tell myself that it was too far away to walk in the cold, or too wet, or too humid.

I think I’m like a lot of people: I’ll work out, but only if the gym is so close that I can’t make an excuse for not going. Let’s call that excuse-free zone “the gym radius”: the distance from home or work that a gym needs to be to get you to visit regularly.

My gym radius is tiny: a 5-minute walk from my apartment. When I lived in Columbia and worked out 4-5 times a week, it was because there was a great gym on the ground floor of my building. It’s tough to make an excuse — even in a snow storm — when all you have to do is walk downstairs to work out. In Springfield, the gym was a short drive away — still close enough for me.

Now I’m at a gym that’s a quarter-mile away — five minutes, door to door. It doesn’t have the classes or the amenities of my old gym, but it turns out that I don’t really care about that. All I want are some machines, an area to stretch, and a short walk — that’s enough to get me out a few times a week to do the work.

I’ve been thinking about what this means for the rest of my work. What are the other situations I need to put myself in to do great work? If I were you, I’d be asking:

Do you work well remotely, or do you need to be in an office? — Some people work well in a remote setting, but others feed off of an office environment, where casual conversations might lead to unexpected ideas. (Some of my favorite projects have been the result of a quick chat in an elevator or by the coffee machine.)

Do you work better with others or prefer to fly solo? — Make sure you know the answer here, and find a role that allows you to play to those strengths.

Do you like to operate as a manager or an independent contributor? — Again, understanding your strengths — Do you like to lead? Do you mind taking on responsibility for the work and output of others? Are you willing to make sacrifices for the sake of your team? — can push you towards the right role in a company.

Can you multi-task, or do you prefer to focus on specific tasks? — I’ve found that most people aren’t great multi-taskers — in fact, multi-tasking typically leads to lost of unfocused, unfinished work. If you’re like me — I’m not a very good multi-tasker — then make sure you’re blocking out time during the day to focus in on one specific project. Even a 30-minute window without distractions can be enough to make huge progress on a task.

These questions are just starting places for a bigger conversation about work habits. But remember this: If you want to do your best work,  make sure you’re putting yourself in the right situations — and the right settings — to do it.

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That photo of someone working out comes via Victor Freitas and Unsplash.